SPACE,
BORING
SIMULATOR

This is

He is 47 years old and plays American football at a primary school.

We asked him what position he plays, but he didn't know the answer.

He wants to be an astronaut when he grows up. We're not sure if he knows what that means.

CONTINUE

In the far future (June 15^th, 2016 to be exact), Dennis became an asteroid miner at Generic Space-Age Corporation 1234.

He was laid off later that day.

A representative from Generic Space-Age Corporation 1234 told Dennis that he would be re-hired if he could prove he was competent at his very short-lived job.

Dennis asked the representative to use smaller words. "Go find a big rock in space and make a hole in it."

This made complete sense to Dennis, who spent the next few months earning space credits so he could afford his own space rock smashing machine.

He now has 3.50.

CONTINUE